"Let's make sure you get something off your wish-list tonight."

Q: What do priests and Christmas trees have in common?
A: Their balls are ornamental.

Q: What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
A: The Christmas alphabet has Noel.

Keep an eye out for elves with ropes and a blindfold! Why? Cause I asked Santa for you this Christmas.

Baby, we need to get together before Christmas — because you can’t spell “love” with No-el.

If you wake up in a box tomorrow morning, it’s cause I asked for the sexiest person in the world for Christmas. Dear Santa, I would like a new birth suit this year. The old one is wrinkly and sagging.

Christmas Pick-Up Lines Part

Are you Adam Sandler? Because I’m ready to give you eight crazy nights.

Forget Santa, you’re on my nice list.

If a big man puts you in a bag tonight, don’t worry. I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

Are you a tree topper? Because I’ve been told I’m a star on top.

If you were a tree, you’d be an evergreen, because I bet you look this good year round.

Q: What did Santa say to his wife?
A: It's going to reindeer.

Q: Why did the Grinch rob the liquor store?
A: He desperately needed some holiday spirit.

Q: Why does Santa land on the roof?
A: Because he likes it on top.

What does One Direction and my Christmas tree have in common?
They both have ornamental balls.

Dear Santa…
Define good.

The second man reached into his pockets and pulled out a set of keys. They jingled as he shook them and he said, "They're bells."

"Santa needs a little helper."

"Your special present is inside my box."

Why did the Snowman want a divorce?
Because his wife was a total flake.

Are you looking for a tree topper? Because I’ve been told I’m a star on top.

Like candy canes and Christmas, me and you were mint for each other.