What is a New Year’s resolution?
Something that goes in one year and out the other.
“It figures this year would end with one giant tea-bagging.”
I mean, it has kind of felt like the world was being a bit of a big ol’ d*ck this year, so it makes sense that it would end this way. In fact, it’s almost poetic. OK, that’s a stretch, but you know what? Allow me to refer you back to joke two for my feelings on the subject.
What’s the problem with jogging on New Year’s Eve?
You’ll spill your punch all over.
How come no one listens to New Year’s resolutions?
They go in one year and out the other.
Sexual New Year Ball Drop Jokes.